Well lovelies, we have reached the end of the #LoveandMarriage series and I hope you guys have enjoyed reading it as much as I have enjoyed writing it! If you missed any of the posts, no worries! Just click the 'Love' tab at the top of my page to view all of the posts from this series plus some great others, or just click here.
Now we aren't finished just yet! Here's my last #loveandmarriage post... for now *wink*.
When Marcus and I made the decision to get married over two years ago, so many people were extremely excited for us and were counting down the days until we became one. We were together for so long prior to us getting married that a lot of people were impatiently waiting haha, so when we got it engaged it was an "about time!" situation for most. Some people thought we were already married because of the dynamic of our relationship and how long we had been together. We had so much support and I am beyond grateful for it.
Now, although we did have those people I mentioned above, we also had the "Marriage? But you're so young!" people in our ears as well. When we got married on April 11, 2015, Marcus was 26 and I was 23 and to some people, that was just too darn young to be thinking about marriage. There are some people that have the belief that you shouldn't get married while you're young because you may miss out on this or that. Although I respect everyone's opinion, in my case, I strongly disagree. I personally do not feel like I am missing out on anything I would want to do. Being married and young does not ruin your life or stop you from having fun! To me, it increases the fun because I have someone who loves and cares for me sharing in that fun with me.
Now, depending on the type of fun you guys may be thinking of, some of that "fun" doesn't work for marriage. So, if you're still in THAT place (I'm not even going to elaborate because y'all know what I'm talking about), then yeah, you're probably not ready. Anyway, I want to take the time to share a few reasons why I LOVE being married and young, plus the perks and benefits of it (IMO)!
1. We Get to Grow Up Together
Marcus and I have known each other since I was 14 and he was 16. We weren't dating back then, but we were friends and it has been amazing to watch him grow up! I remember the 16 year old Marcus as I'm sure he remembers the awkward 14 year old Jamaria. We have been together through high school craziness, college EVEN MORE craziness, big and small moves around the world, career changes, plus so much more. I watched my husband grow from a great boyfriend, to a phenomenal fiance, to an irreplaceable husband and I can't wait to watch him grow into the role of father some day.
2. We Had Low Expectations
Now, what I mean by that is we didn't have years of friends and people around us getting married and we didn't have the change to formulate in our minds what the perfect marriage should be like or look like. Being so young, we truly had no idea what to expect out of marriage. All we knew is that we wanted it to work. We just went with the flow, keeping the fact that we are very much in love at the center of everything.
3. There's Less Baggage
Although we met in high school, Marcus and I were not 'high school sweetharts', and we dated other people before we finally got together. Although we both share different pasts, I can confidently say that Marcus was my first and only adult relationship. The intimacy, the living together, the real-life issues, all with him and only him. Marcus scooped me up off the market when I was 18 years old, so how could I truly have any baggage with anyone else?
4. We Can Plan For the Future
When you're young, you can do a lot of dreaming, planning, and mapping out your life the way you want it to be years from now, and then actually have plenty of time to make those dreams a reality. This is not to say when you get married older you can't do this as well, but more than likely, you have already had separate dreams and it may be a little harder to make them joint dreams. We can spend time investing in our marriage before the biological clock starts ticking and we will have to have children and invest in them. Which brings me to my next reason...
5. We Get to BE MARRIED before Having Children
Now, y'all know the statistics say for women it's best to have children before you reach your 30's. I do know many women who have had children in their 30's (my mom for example) and been fine. However, marrying young gave me time to enjoy the married life before we decide to bring children into this world. We get to travel, spoil each other and ourselves, and really get to know each other and our marriage dynamics before we add children into the mix.
6. We Get to Share Every Milestone and Achievement
Marcus and I have been there for each other through so many different milestones! I got to see him progress through his field (the highs and lows), he got to see me grow in mine (the highs and lows). He was there and encouraged me to start TJE! Honestly, if it wasn't for his love and push, who knows, I might still be blog stalking on Instagram saying "man, I want to do that" instead of just DOING IT! Starting so young allows us the time to continue to watch each other achieve great things!
7. It Was Pretty Easy to Combine Our Lives
Being so young in our relationship, we didn't really have any hard habits we needed to break or any crazy hard patterns in life we had to change. Instead, we were lucky enough to build habits and patterns together from the beginning. Although Marcus did leave his life in NYC behind to be with me, he didn't have any hard habits from "bachelor life" to get rid of. We had no court paperwork to worry about (child support, prenups, etc.), but instead we just combined our young, uninteresting lives together. Haha
8. Our Memory Bank is LOADED
Marcus and I have so many memories together, it's insane. We find ourselves sitting around sometimes thinking about how long we have been in each other's lives and sharing crazy memories. The fact that my husband knew me when I was 14 years old still baffles me today. I remember 16 year old Marcus as well though, and we both have stories that could fill a book, with only more pages to be added as the years progress!
------------------------------------------------
So there you have it guys! I could probably come up with a zillion more reasons why I love being young and married, but I'll just leave it there. Let me just say that I know everyone's path in life is different and I respect that. No one should be judged for the decisions they make in life because those decisions are YOUR decisions to make. Whether you decide to get married young or not at all, have kids young or not at all, it's no one's position to tell you you're right or wrong in those instances. Live your life they way you want to live it and don't apologize for it!
Now we aren't finished just yet! Here's my last #loveandmarriage post... for now *wink*.
When Marcus and I made the decision to get married over two years ago, so many people were extremely excited for us and were counting down the days until we became one. We were together for so long prior to us getting married that a lot of people were impatiently waiting haha, so when we got it engaged it was an "about time!" situation for most. Some people thought we were already married because of the dynamic of our relationship and how long we had been together. We had so much support and I am beyond grateful for it.
Now, although we did have those people I mentioned above, we also had the "Marriage? But you're so young!" people in our ears as well. When we got married on April 11, 2015, Marcus was 26 and I was 23 and to some people, that was just too darn young to be thinking about marriage. There are some people that have the belief that you shouldn't get married while you're young because you may miss out on this or that. Although I respect everyone's opinion, in my case, I strongly disagree. I personally do not feel like I am missing out on anything I would want to do. Being married and young does not ruin your life or stop you from having fun! To me, it increases the fun because I have someone who loves and cares for me sharing in that fun with me.
Now, depending on the type of fun you guys may be thinking of, some of that "fun" doesn't work for marriage. So, if you're still in THAT place (I'm not even going to elaborate because y'all know what I'm talking about), then yeah, you're probably not ready. Anyway, I want to take the time to share a few reasons why I LOVE being married and young, plus the perks and benefits of it (IMO)!
1. We Get to Grow Up Together
Marcus and I have known each other since I was 14 and he was 16. We weren't dating back then, but we were friends and it has been amazing to watch him grow up! I remember the 16 year old Marcus as I'm sure he remembers the awkward 14 year old Jamaria. We have been together through high school craziness, college EVEN MORE craziness, big and small moves around the world, career changes, plus so much more. I watched my husband grow from a great boyfriend, to a phenomenal fiance, to an irreplaceable husband and I can't wait to watch him grow into the role of father some day.
2. We Had Low Expectations
Now, what I mean by that is we didn't have years of friends and people around us getting married and we didn't have the change to formulate in our minds what the perfect marriage should be like or look like. Being so young, we truly had no idea what to expect out of marriage. All we knew is that we wanted it to work. We just went with the flow, keeping the fact that we are very much in love at the center of everything.
3. There's Less Baggage
Although we met in high school, Marcus and I were not 'high school sweetharts', and we dated other people before we finally got together. Although we both share different pasts, I can confidently say that Marcus was my first and only adult relationship. The intimacy, the living together, the real-life issues, all with him and only him. Marcus scooped me up off the market when I was 18 years old, so how could I truly have any baggage with anyone else?
4. We Can Plan For the Future
When you're young, you can do a lot of dreaming, planning, and mapping out your life the way you want it to be years from now, and then actually have plenty of time to make those dreams a reality. This is not to say when you get married older you can't do this as well, but more than likely, you have already had separate dreams and it may be a little harder to make them joint dreams. We can spend time investing in our marriage before the biological clock starts ticking and we will have to have children and invest in them. Which brings me to my next reason...
5. We Get to BE MARRIED before Having Children
Now, y'all know the statistics say for women it's best to have children before you reach your 30's. I do know many women who have had children in their 30's (my mom for example) and been fine. However, marrying young gave me time to enjoy the married life before we decide to bring children into this world. We get to travel, spoil each other and ourselves, and really get to know each other and our marriage dynamics before we add children into the mix.
6. We Get to Share Every Milestone and Achievement
Marcus and I have been there for each other through so many different milestones! I got to see him progress through his field (the highs and lows), he got to see me grow in mine (the highs and lows). He was there and encouraged me to start TJE! Honestly, if it wasn't for his love and push, who knows, I might still be blog stalking on Instagram saying "man, I want to do that" instead of just DOING IT! Starting so young allows us the time to continue to watch each other achieve great things!
7. It Was Pretty Easy to Combine Our Lives
Being so young in our relationship, we didn't really have any hard habits we needed to break or any crazy hard patterns in life we had to change. Instead, we were lucky enough to build habits and patterns together from the beginning. Although Marcus did leave his life in NYC behind to be with me, he didn't have any hard habits from "bachelor life" to get rid of. We had no court paperwork to worry about (child support, prenups, etc.), but instead we just combined our young, uninteresting lives together. Haha
8. Our Memory Bank is LOADED
Marcus and I have so many memories together, it's insane. We find ourselves sitting around sometimes thinking about how long we have been in each other's lives and sharing crazy memories. The fact that my husband knew me when I was 14 years old still baffles me today. I remember 16 year old Marcus as well though, and we both have stories that could fill a book, with only more pages to be added as the years progress!
------------------------------------------------
So there you have it guys! I could probably come up with a zillion more reasons why I love being young and married, but I'll just leave it there. Let me just say that I know everyone's path in life is different and I respect that. No one should be judged for the decisions they make in life because those decisions are YOUR decisions to make. Whether you decide to get married young or not at all, have kids young or not at all, it's no one's position to tell you you're right or wrong in those instances. Live your life they way you want to live it and don't apologize for it!
To all of my young and married people out there, tell me: Why do you love being married and young? Drop me a comment below and let me know!
Thanks so much for reading and supporting my #loveandmarriage series! xo
Post a Comment
Any comments you share with me are very much appreciated and I do my best to respond to each of you. I love feedback in all forms. Thank you for taking the time to share your feedback and love with me. xo