5.05.2016

10 Habits of A Happy, Healthy & Fulfilling Relationship


 Happy THURSDAY my lovelies!

The other day when Marcus & I were at the mall, we were shopping in Macy's in the women's shoe department (surprise, surprise haha). I kept noticing this lady staring at us, but I tried to ignore her. As we got closer to her, the stares became more obvious and I could tell that Marcus was starting to notice it too. Once we made eye contact, I smiled at her. She then leaned in and whispered to us, "Did you guys just get married?" I responded that we got married a year ago. She then said "You two look so happy and make a beautiful couple." We politely thanked her and kept on shopping. When we walked away I asked Marcus, "What made her ask that?" He then responded, "I guess we still have that 'just married' glow". He is absolutely right.

Marcus and I are best friends and we have such great energy with one another. It was so random, yet so reassuring to know that we make that sort of an impact on strangers and that we still have "that glow" of happiness. We get asked so many times about our relationship and what we do to make it work, so today, I decided that I would share with you guys 10 habits of a happy, healthy, and fulfilling relationship 'Through Jam's Eyes'. These are MY OPINIONS of what helps to make a relationship strong, but I do know that everyone is different. So, take these words in stride and if you feel so inclined, apply them to your life and relationship. xo

#10) Have a Good Relationship With Yourself

This is so important. You can't fully commit to having a healthy relationship with someone else until you find that happiness within yourself first. The relationship you have with yourself is the foundation of which other relationships are built upon. Find what makes you happy. 

#9) Don't Lose Your Sexy

It can be easy to get comfortable and not wear heels as much as you used to or put on that 'candy apple red lipstick' your man loves so much because you're tired or just don't care anymore or fellas you don't go to the gym anymore because you're tired, but don't do it. Keep your significant other intrigued and wanting more. I'm not saying you have to look perfect all day every day, but don't let your significant other forget why they were attracted to you in the first place. Ladies, pull out that 'freak-um' dress every now and then and fellas, flash those muscles. :)

#8) Keep It Fun & Light 

There is nothing worse than having a super fun and spontaneous dating relationship, and then once you're serious, all the fun stops. Why? There's no need for that! Keep your relationship fun and light hearted. If you didn't take those things so serious before, don't start now. Of course, as you grow as a couple, there will be things you might not like about the other person that will come out, but settle it in a healthy way and then get right back to having fun.

#7) Don't Settle Arguments When You're Mad

When you feel anger, avoid saying or yelling words you can't take back. Try taking a vow of silence instead, just for a few minutes, to calm down inside. Often times we say things in the heat of the moment that leave marks that will never go away. Marcus and I can have an argument and we can go to separate rooms for awhile and cool down, and I've found that when we do that, once we regroup to discuss the problem, we can do it in a much more mature fashion. Remember, seek to understand... not agree and if you so happen to agree, all the better.

#6) Make time to Spend Time

Make time for each other. We all have busy schedules, and so we often forget the importance of quality time. Two people can be right next to each other, yet miles apart. Sitting on the couch watching tv, or working on the computer is not quality time because neither party is engaged with the other. Carve out special time for just the two of you at least once a week to do something you both enjoy.

#5) Appreciate and Uplift Each Other

Having an open appreciation for your significant other leads to a productive, fulfilling and peaceful relationship. Thank them for the small things they do for you each day! Celebrate their accomplishments, and encourage their goals and ambitions! I am always quick to say that Marcus is my motivation because he is. If your significant other ever feels down on themselves, challenge them to keep going and to be the best they can be.

#4) Be Loyal and Devoted

This is a big one! Love is about two people being true to each other even when they are separated. No one said you have to spend every single moment with your significant other, you should keep your friends and hobbies, but your significant other should be able to trust that you are devoted and true when you're away. When it comes to healthy, long-lasting relationships, remaining faithful is never an option, but a priority. Loyalty is everything.    

#3) Understand: Every Relationship is Different

It's easy to look onto someone else's yard and to think their flowers are blooming more quickly and more beautifully than yours, but focusing on your own flowers, you'll notice that you have a different type of flower than them, and that is okay. Don’t compare your relationship to anyone else. No relationship is perfect and every couple makes their own love rules and habits. Just focus on you two, and make your relationship the best it can be!

#2) Communication is Key

No one is a mind-reader so your partner won't be able to figure out how you’re feeling. Don't expect your partner to climb mountains to find out what is going on in your emotional brain. It's not fair to either party of the relationship. Be open! Be transparent! Be specific and clear with yourself on what you want and make an effort to discover what your partner’s needs are.

#1) Have Realistic Expectations

Real relationships aren’t what you see in the movies. Real relationships take a lot of hard work and compromise. Understand, not all days are passionate and romantic. You will see rough spots and that is okay. It will require good communication and a level head, but you'll make it through.

Do you guys have any habits for a healthy relationship you would like to share? I'd love to read them. Leave me a comment below! Thank you so much for reading! XOXO       

2 comments:

  1. Love this! All these are great points especially keeping it fun and light. Although relationships do take work and compromise, it is possible to not feel like "work" all the time. And really simply things can create that fun and light atmosphere.

    Lastly, I would be the first to say don't be afraid to check yourself. It's always easy to say what someone else has done, but we all have blinders. The effort you take to understand where you may have caused a rift in a relationship is probably more significant than just apologizing.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Kierra,

      Absolutely! You are so right! Learning to check yourself is essential in a relationship because in reality no one person can be right all the time. Showing humility and the willingness to compromise is key! :)

      Delete

Any comments you share with me are very much appreciated and I do my best to respond to each of you. I love feedback in all forms. Thank you for taking the time to share your feedback and love with me. xo